By Helen Ovbiagele

How the times are changing! I never thought that there would come a time in my country when citizens would not want to have many children, to the point that many young couples now opt to have just two children, or three at most. What’s more, these young people, at least, those I spoke to on the issue, are not bothered whether they have all boys or all girls. This is quite a departure from the usual craving for a male child by most families. So, why are young people now rooting for a small family?

Mainly for financial and emotional reasons. They want the best in education and all the good things of life for their children, and since everything associated with raising children is getting more and more expensive, it makes sense to limit the number of children you have to what you can comfortably cater for financially, and also have money to put aside for a comfortable old age for yourself. Also, fewer number of children means you have less children to supervise, monitor and worry about. Hopefully, this will enable you have a closer and more meaningful relationship with the few you have.

The interesting thing is that many of those who want to limit the number of children they have, are people who have the means to look after several children, if they have to. This means that many of those in the low-income group, who are unable to live a decent life, are those who are having more children than they can look after. This tendency has contributed immensely to an increase in criminal activities as the children from such homes live rough on the streets and try to fend for themselves.

“Sister Helen, since we don’t have the social security system in Nigeria, it is important that we embark on a serious campaign on the need to have small families, that parents can look comfortably after. Parents should realise that if they can’t look after the wards, supplying them with the basic necessities of life, like feeding, clothing and housing, they’re on their own. The government in this country is not going to do this for them.

Right now there’s a huge unemployment problem for graduates from higher institutions. They roam the streets day and night hunting for jobs which are just not there. This is a nightmare for them and their parents, some of whom may still be having more children. I think the government should jail the parents of children found wandering about homeless, in the big cities. Thank you. – Mudia , Benin City.”

“Madam, Nigeria is the most populous black nation in the world, so, I don’t think that the figure of 167 million is too high for us. The problem with uncontrolled population explosion, which fortunately, we’re still quite far from, is the poverty it generates for citizens; which drives the abject poor to eating from the dustbins.

We’re not a poor country by any means, and there’s no reason why we shouldn’t be able to cater for the basic necessities of life for the citizenry. Experts on population are afraid for us because the nation’s wealth is not spreading from the top down to the grassroots, due to the greed of our rulers and those in power.

These ones are so concerned about laying up fortune for generations of their descendants that they steal public money unashamedly. Look at the way our law-makers are alleged to be asking for more money/allowances for themselves when pensioners don’t get their measly monthly allowance regularly, and some die on the queue during the annual verification exercise.

Many of these pensioners have unemployed adult children who they still have to cater for, because the government has failed to generate jobs for young graduates. Our government is incompetent at any given time. They choose to chase shadows and leave the real work undone. – A Retiree, Oyo State.”

“Here in South-East Nigeria, many parents see children as gifts from God. Religious organizations dedicate these children, assuring their parents that ‘the God of miracle is their papa’. Government on their part continue to fight corruption with kids’ gloves, thereby encouraging the spread of poverty – Dick Nnaji, Agbani, Enugu.”

“While not restricting parents to a particular number of children that they should have, like in China and India, our government should take a firm stand on Nigerians having more children they can love and look after responsibly. Campaign on this by government, should be carried into the hinterland – villages and hamlets.

When I see the desperation on the faces of the young and mostly uneducated okada riders in the big cities, I feel sorry for our nation. While some have a goal and are in the business for a limited period so that they can save up for something else, many of them sleep rough, have no education, and no worthwhile future career to look forward to.

They ride anyhow and are rowdy and ready for a fight at the drop of a hat. Many times, I asked myself if the government of their state is aware of their existence. I doubt it. The government just doesn’t care. Every birth should be recorded and the local government area should follow up on that child; monitoring its growth, ensuring that he’s given the various immunizations at the right time, and when he’s five, advise the parents on choices of schools in their area.

No local government is doing this right now in this country; talkless of their having a list of the unemployed youths in their area. So, it’s unwise for parents to pour out children they can’t cater for financially or emotionally. Heaven help us. – Grace, Ikeja.”

“Aunty Helen, good day. With regards to Nigeria’s increasing population, let the truth be told. Nigeria’s real population is unknown. The figure of 167 million put out by government officials, is a scam, in my opinion, to attract unsuspecting donors. – Celestine, mnse”

“Madam, if less human beings are invited into the world in our country, the government will be able to cope with providing education, health care, and the relevant social services adequately. But if we continue to breed in an irresponsible manner, the nation will gradually be driven into abject poverty, which will pull along the rich also.

It’s time to rein in our appetite for having huge families. Have only the children that you can conveniently cater for financially, without going to beg, borrow or steal; or ruining your health.”

We thank all those who took time to write in.