By Bunmi Sofola

A man once recalled a party he attended at one of his in-laws’ house. It was a very lively party and he got so sloshed that when sleep eventually enveloped him, he welcomed it. You can, therefore imagine how embarrassed he was when he woke up the following morning on one of the party tables! All guests were long gone and the neighbourhood was noisily waking up to a new day. All eyes were curiously on him as he scurried off.

Another family man told me his wife had already given up on trying to persuade him not to go to parties on Friday nights only to return on Saturday mornings. On one particular morning, however, he drove home confidently, only to be greeted by the landlord on the balcony. He told me: “You can imagine how embarrassed that made me feel. The landlord has always been like a father to me and my family. Seeing me coming in at seven in the morning, made me feel like a thief caught dipping his hand in the till. To complete my embarrassment, his wife and some of the children were with him. It put a temporary hold on my wild nights!”

Embarrassment is something we all have to put up with one time or the other. But do you know why you get embarrassed or how to cope with situations that get you flustered? Here are some facts about embarrassment as compounded by some experts.

Is a woman more embarrassed than a man?

No. Psychological studies show women have much more social poise than men and are better able to take an embarrassing moment in their stride.

Is a person with high opinion of himself the most easily embarrassed?

No. People with low self esteem are more easily embarrassed by real or imagined criticism of their clothes, attitudes or manners. They tend to feel others are judging them and finding them wanting. And their low esteem makes them believe the negative evaluations are valid.

What’s the easiest way to make a man get flustered?

Tell him, something’s wrong with his clothes—especially in mixed company; that would not embarrass a woman. It would just make her annoyed. And women don’t get as easily flustered as men.

Are we more easily embarrassed as we get old?

No, The adolescent years are when we’re most prone to embarrassment.

Is the best way to cope with an embarrassing moment simply to act as though nothing happened?

No. That often increased the tension of everyone involved. A sociological study show that the best way to cope is to laugh it off. This invites others to view the moment as something they can laugh at too.